A Love so Pure

I had been looking forward to getting out of that ***** school for so long I imagined that the day I actually broke free would be...the best day of my life, I thought nothing could overshadow the feeling of freedom and joy I would feel. I was certain nothing could mean more to me on that day that graduating and walking out that ***** school.Boy oh boy was I wrong. As soon as he confirmed he was coming thoughts of the moment I would walk across that stage were completely overshadowed by thoughts of the moment I would set my eyes on him, and hold him, and hear his voice. Throughout the graduation reception I couldn't concentrate, I was scouring the audience for him, turning my head at every shout, hoping that was him a little too excited. Even at the most important moment, when I was in the middle of that stage, nothing else was in my mind, but him, my beloved brother R.F.N

Due to some family misunderstandings and bullshit, I didn't grow up with my brother, the first time we hugged I was 17, he was 24. But the moment I lay my head on his shoulder I loved him so much I didn't want to let him go. He was a grown man, married with a kid, but I wanted to protect him. Haha. Growing up, knowing he existed but not seeing him, I daydreamed and made up memories. I'd be at the fair with my sisters and wonder which ride R.F.N would like... When I was bullied in high school, I'd push my lower lip out and think these kids wouldn't have dared to touch me if my big bro had been here. 

I loved him and trusted him even before I met him.

Now that I am getting ready to move far far away from him (929mi away to be exact)...I decided to spend a few days with him and his family. The love I feel for my brother is like nothing I have ever felt. 

We sit up late into the night catching up on the years we have missed. We do the things we should have been allowed to do, like pillow fight, or sing, or discuss relationships... We go shopping together, go out for dinner, laugh, cook, dance, cry. I can be me with him and not worry what he thinks, because I know he'll love me anyway. He has become my best friend, he knows me more than anyone else.

Okay, to you this might not seem as big a deal as it is to me. But i grew up knowing he existed but he just wasn't there. I grew up wishing my one and only big brother was there for me. And now he is. I am a grown woman and he still tries to buy me candy when we go to a store. He comes to my room in the morning and we talk about nothing and everything while I'm still in bed and he's sprawled across the floor. Leaving him will be hard, but necessary. I know my phone bill will show exactly how much I miss him..I better make him one of my Faves..hehe.

R.F.N's slowly getting spoilt lil sis,
MystiQue